#1 Columbian (!) Coffee

No. No it ain't Stirbucks (sorry for name change but I don't want to be sued). Sorry. I believe that over the years, since I have tried my first Stirbucks in 1998 I have spent thousands real bucks on Stirbucks annually only to realize that it is all some sort of a con to get you into their comfy little facility with cozy chairs and nice music and buy some sort of a latte and some sort of a cookie and be all about the environment and then one hour later you realize that you really need to go back and get something else because the coffee they sold you did not work.

I don't think people have caught on to it, so I am here to open everyone's eyes.

Of course, I am primarily talking about lattes and frappucinos and all that crazy crap they have going on there with all the sweets and crap that during the day just makes you freaking fat and lazy and craving for more. And then it's a freaking end of the day and you realize that all you have done during the day is spent, like, $20 on lattes and biscotti's and little cookies they have.

So, forget Stirbacks. What works is real black "Columbian Coffee" at your local gas station.

If you don't believe me, do a me a favor, get yourself a mug. A real, manly, 16oz mug of some real Columbian stuff at your friendly Speedway ror something.

At first you will be like, holy crap, this is not real coffee, it has no oreo cookies in it and it doesn't even have a whip cream and it tastes so funny, bitter and stuff. And then it will hit you, oh, crap, this stuff works! You can stay up all the way until lunch and then some without any breakfast!

So here is my energy review based on my Things That Give You Energy star rating:

Columbian Black Coffee 16Oz:

Hours after consumption     Stars
   1                                          5
   3                                          5
   5                                          5


Hey guys, girls, please comment, since I just killed any possibility of this blog being sponsored by Stirbucks :(